387 days later!

So I didn't blog on my 1 year anniversary of having brain surgery! I had every intention of publishing a post that talked about what a milestone this was, how the last year has been, how I feel, what has changed and what has stayed the same but I just never got around to it. Work had been ridiculously busy and I couldn't muster up the energy to type up something. I'm now on school holidays and have a few hours to spare here or there!

So here it goes! 13 months ago there would have been two significant events that I would have thought of if you mentioned September the 11th. On that day in 2005 I hopped on a plane at the tender age of 18 to go and volunteer overseas for 6 months and also on that day in 2001 the horrible tragedy of the World Trade Center occurred. I now have 3 major events to link with that date. September 11, 2013 is when I underwent brain surgery.

387 days later I'm still here! I'm still breathing & singing and doing a few other things.

Since my 1 year anniversary I have had another MRI. It was the first MRI that didn't bring me to tears. Now that in itself folks is another milestone! I have also had an appointment with a Dr. from one of my rehab clinics and that was the last time I need to see her. I'll be seeing my Neurosurgeon in about a month and am praying it is all good news. Anxious as usual!

Last night I saw a show on TV called Brain Hospital: Saving Lives. I only saw half of it but it is basically a show that documents peoples journeys before and after brain surgery. I saw, literally, how they most probably cut through my skull, held my skin back and some other yucky stuff! Apart from those gruesome visuals, watching that show was, in a weird way, a gentle and positive reminder that I'm not alone in this part of the journey. I don't mean alone as in I have no friends and family there for me I mean that I was reminded that there are others who can genuinely empathise for me and I can empathise for them. I'm thinking of you fellow brain tumour bloggers! There's a big difference between sympathy and empathy.

I took the photo below at Brighton Beach this evening. It's a shame photos can't quite capture emotions.

 Psalm 103:12

 Thanks for reading!

I've got this

It fascinates me how concerned about me some of the Dr.s and my immediate family were the first week after my surgery. I personally knew I was ok but they didn't. It's weird. I think talking about it with others now is interesting and can be quite amusing. My mum told me she knew I was OK the first time I turned on the TV and saw an add for a top end hairdressing salon and I then pointed to my partially shaved head and jokingly said '$20,000'. Apparently it made her smile for a few days.

On another note I also think about how painful it must be for those who know that cognitively they understand everything but they simply cannot make themselves verbally understood to others due to brain injuries or impairments they were born with. It saddens me and was actually one of my biggest fears that I may end up like that.

I'm grateful.

Success!

I went back to work today. It was only for half a day and it was fine. Not the best lessons ever. The best lessons seem to be the lessons that you either haven't planned for much or the ones that go waaaay differently than you expected and then you achieve more than you had hoped for.

I received plenty of hugs, lots of waves from students that I walked past who were surprised to see me and one little cherub came running up to me before school had started and exclaimed 'Frau Soandso, you're back!',  it was adorable. It's amazing how much these students have grown in 10 weeks and boy oh boy some of the students I taught today are definitely showing their 6-7 year old attitudes. Kinda funny.

Anyway, nap time. Back to school next Tuesday for the first full day since September eek!

No card but a BIG thank-you and a high 5!

For now, swimming lessons are over. As an Australian it's quite usual to not show your "pride" or "boast" about your accomplishments because there's this idea that if you do you are egocentric. You know what?! I am proud of what I've just done and you know what else, I'm OK to share that pride. For me it's not about being egocentric it's about sharing my accomplishment or rather the fact that I overcame a fear. Make of it what you will.